Leave the Letter and live again! (chapters 17-18)
For the first time ever in many years, I feel relief. For all these years I’ve been living seeking for God’s and people’s forgiveness. I spent my days paying for the terrible sin I committed and trying to do everything I could for being forgiven. I was patient and willing to accept the punishment that I deserve. I lived by myself, with the only company of my little child, far away from everyone. I’ve been walking along the streets aware that everyone was looking and whispering at me, aware that the town’s children don’t want to play with my unlucky Pearl. I fought and prayed the people to let me keep my daughter and don’t take her away from me. I kept a Scarlet A Letter on my chest for all this time and lived under its terrible burden. I kept an important secret, and for this reason I stayed away from my love.
But now it’s time to change. I can’t live like this anymore, I can’t destroy my daughter’s life, and I can’t keep looking at Arthur’s sickness. I decided that I waited enough, and that now is time to live again. If we stay here, nothing will change; Arthur will become sicker and sicker, Chillingworth will destroy our lives, and Pearl and I will continue to live in the shadow. Before I told anything to Arthur, I searched on internet for a not too expensive agency. I found a website that seems affordable and reliable: http://www.mayflower.com/moving/ .
I now that this is the right decision. When I said that to Dimmesdale in the forest I felt free for the first time in seven years! I said to him, “let’s not look back, the past is gone. Let’s throw it away… like this!” (102) and I through the Scarlet Letter away!! I didn’t realize how heavy and sad was to carry it. I was joyful and smiled for the first time to the world, to God. In that moment I could feel a warm ray of sun on my face; it was in that precise moment that I understood I was doing the right thing and God has forgiven me!
image source: paint