“Failed plans should not be interpreted as a failed vision. Visions don’t change, they are only refined. Plans rarely stay the same, and are scrapped or adjusted as needed. Be stubborn about the vision, but flexible with your plan.” John C. Maxwell says. I agree with his statement. I try to think through his perspective, but shame myself when I don’t try hard enough to work toward my goal because although I am only 13, I have grand plans for my life. I plan to a high school for the arts, attend FIT college in New York City, live in a beautiful neighborhood, get married, and have adorable children. Even though this plan may be refined over time, it will basically stay the same. As a grow, I expect to follow this plan. It’s almost like an easy-to-follow map to keep my life on track. My biggest fear is that this plan will be ruined by an unexpected event, and make my life like a roller coaster, with unforeseen twists and turns. I wouldn’t mind a few surprises, but I have goals in mind that I fear I may not be able to reach if my life takes another path.

When I was ten, I heard about the Fashion Institute of Technology. It seemed like a dream. Right out of a barbie movie, where I could have the chance to be the star. Since I loved drawing, painting, and shopping, I thought, “I could be a fashion designer!” To attend college in the heart of the city, learn about fashion, be exposed to different trends, noises, sounds and cultures made me dizzy with excitement. When we drove to the big apple around Thanksgiving time later that year, I visited the FIT museum to look around. I was astounded by all the history, artifacts, beautiful clothing, and exotic labels. There, I discovered Lauren Bacall. She was a beautiful old Hollywood actress and fashionista, born in the 1920’s. Her clothing was on display. Her Bacall and the Boys fall 1960’s fall fashion preview was playing on a projector.  I watched her movies, read some of her autobiography, Lauren Bacall, By Myself (personally signed, thanks to my grandmother) and analyzed her perfect eyebrows. Then I began to think, “Why can’t I be like her?”

That’s where my plan began. Every night after, I had dreams about college. Endless fun, cute outfits, and my name in lights. I craved to be in the city. The noise, smells, and the ora of it all made butterflies dance in my stomach. It seemed so perfect and achievable, but somewhere, buzzing in the back of my mind, I knew it was unrealistic. I directed my thoughts towards the positive aspects of a flexible future, but was disheartened to know that my life wouldn’t be as glamorous as Bacall’s movies.

Now, I have a slightly different way of seeing things. I will work towards smaller goals. One of my goals is to be more accepting of an unplanned fate. I will close my eyes and try my best to go where the wind blows me. Sometimes I confuse myself, because I am very flexible with the changing of small plans. If I wanted to wear a dress to school but it was in the washing machine, I would never throw a fit. Even if a family vacation was cancelled, I wouldn’t be too sad about it. But I will try to let go of my fear of messing up my overall plan, one small goal at a time. Like John Maxwell says, “Failed plans should not be interpreted as a failed vision.” I will try my hardest to do as these words say, and to embrace wherever life takes me.