The Speaking Fear

As I watch my classmates present well before me

I hear the teacher speak YOUR UP!

All pain only just starts

As I get get up there

All I can see is my classmates staring straight at me

Thousands of eyes stare as they shoot fireballs directly at my body

As I get further and further into my presentation I hear whispers from my peers

me expecting the worst I panic and start to sweat

this panic attack is like a poison in my mouth killing me

putting me in a void

A void of fear with no courage in site

as I go further and further into this void I start to smell smoke

It was smoke coming from my heart from the burning pain in my chest

further and further I go now I’m sweating so much its weight is pulling me down

I burn and burn until it’s over

by that point the fire fighters are pulling me from this void and putting out this fire

after I cool down I wake up as if nothing had happened but still

Still I feel that I have been traumatized

it doesn’t change that I’m just preparing for another attack

When all I’m thinking about is the end

But then I begin to think is there really an end to this

as I run it through my head I thought

F

O

R

E

V

E

R

The Journey In Darkness

Down the stairs I go
Alone in darkness
With a candle in hand
With it’s stone walls
And it’s stone stairs

Down the stairs I go
Hand on the wall
Damp and mossy
Supporting me
On my way down

Down the stairs I go
Other than footsteps
Is dripping of water
Splashing down on my head
Extinguishing my candle

Down the stairs I go
Alone in darkness
With my candle
That no longer emits light
On an endless flight of stairs

Alone in the dark
With light gone
With a cold taste in my mouth
Placing my candle
Onto the damp stone stairs

Down the stairs I go
Alone in darkness
Stumbling on a step
Falling down fast
Down many steps

As I got back up
And continued my way
I seem to be in place
As if stairs were moving
And not me

Then I turned around
Looking behind me
I see some bright light
And I finally realize
It was my imagination

The Major Fear

Dying will always be a big fear of mine and will stick with me until that day. Dying has always been a question or a thought that goes through the back and front of my mind. I always wanted to know what that day would be like but i know now that i would have to find out.

 

I have always been afraid of dying because everyone in my life or anyone close to me has always died unexpectedly or they were here just too sick to to keep going with their sick life. Dying has a major impact in everyone’s life but it scares me knowing that everyone and even me has to die someday and that we would never know when or how. Most of my family is still with me on earth and most of them has already dies in so many ways and some are worse than the other. I always had a fear that i would die an unhappy life or not living up to my standards and completing all of my goal.I always question to myself and imaged the possibilities of how i would die but with the was i had imagined it was like me being murdered or something tragic.

 

I am afraid of dying because i am afraid of doing everything i wanted and not being the person i wanted or the person everyone would remember me as. When i die i want to die living up to all of my standards and completing all of my goals and becoming the person i want to be. I have feared many times that when i die i wouldn’t be remembered the person i want to be remembered as.

 

Dying is one of my major fears and i know that one day we are all going to to die and that it is only natural and human nature. I have learned to accept that someday, but still it will be one of my major fear and will always cross my mind. Having this fear has made me wonder what my life would be like if i had completely overcome that fear and have the courage to live up to my fate. Dying is one of my biggest fears and hearing how people die and hearing about so many people died made me wonder what will happen to me or when will i die or how would i die.

The Future

The Future,

I wonder what it would be like.

I wonder what I’d be like.

Maybe flying cars and

Robots with emotions

and a job,

a job in which

I get money

to pay

the

Money collectors,

to get back my house,

the house my family owned

for many generations,

the house they took

to pay off

MY dept.

The dept that I

got myself into

by borrowing money from

them.

The collectors that

beat me and my family to a bloody pulp

every month

if they didn’t get what they

need,

or should I say what they want

The need that I

PLEAD

for mercy

hoping to go back to the

Past

The Future,

I wonder what it would be like,

I wonder what I’d be like

By: Ayda

The Big Water

The Ocean

So strong and so powerful

Pulling you away

So  evil it will deceive you

changing your life forever

Take you away

To a better place

 

The ocean

So powerful

So deep

so dangerous

so harmful

Filled with animals that could make you disappear

Forever

 

The waves take you farther and farther

Away from life

so strong they take your breath away

with your life

You hear the kids screaming

You jump in and try to help

But it’s too strong

too dangerous

The ocean

 

The Panic of a Child

A storm starts brewing in your soul’s once peaceful sea;

Welled up tears,

Anger,

Fears,

Collected in one giant hurricane of “Oh, poor me!”

 

It comes crashing,

Bashing, down upon you;

Maimed,

In pain,

Crying.

 

The torrents of tears burn the skin,

Asking questions you’ve hidden within;

The Why?’s

The What?’s

How did you let this happen?

 

Every second ticks loud and fast,

You take look in the past;

Times of tears,

Don’ts and didn’ts.

There’s no room for comforts here.

 

Like the monster hidden underneath your bed,

Eyes wish not to behold, much rather it be dead;

A writhing,

Screaming,

Child of pain and tormented tears.

 

Children beware;

Demons and monsters

Crawl and creep.

Picking at your soul while you sleep.

You may survive for a while, but soon enough…

 

With the storms of roiling, boiling, sadness and confusion,

A girl of joy,

Never tears,

Will find herself

A roiling ball of agony.

 

By: Julie

Myself and My Fear

I am afraid

Afraid of Fear

He swoops in with no resistance

into my brain, my heart

It gives me a reason to be afraid

Reactions, thoughts shoot across my

consciousness like bullets across a dead sky

This is where Fear comes from

This why I am afraid

 

Pulling, tugging me into oblivion

They say Fear is always good

They are wrong

Giving into fear is giving up

On anything that was good about life

Don’t give up

Don’t be afraid

 

They, the people are out to get me

Teasing, yelling, hitting, hating

They are his servants

Waiting for me to show weakness

I will not give up

Not to them

Not to Fear

They will never see me crumble

To his will

 

Fear is a part of me

I do not like me

But I will not give in

I will not give up

I am strong

I am not afraid

 

 

The Other Side

The Other Side

Ethan

 

“What’s out there?” my eight-year old brother asked. He pointed up at the fifteen-foot concrete barrier that surrounded our village. The wall protected us, like a cage. The village was an acre wide, surrounded by the wall. No one had gone outside in decades. Those who did never returned.

“No one knows,” I replied. “Personally, I never want to find out. I would rather live in ignorance than be killed by whatever’s out there.” My brother frowned. The leaves danced, with a gust of wind.

“We have to get going soon. A storm is coming.” My brother stopped walking.

“Come on,” I told him, but he didn’t budge.

 

“How do you know that there’s something bad out there? You’re afraid for no reason. Maybe the reason everyone who’s ever left never came back was because it’s so great.” My brother wasn’t like anyone else. He never fit in with the other kids, and always talked about this nonsense. Boom! A thunderclap filled my ears.

 

“We have to go right now,” I told him.

 

“Fine,” he replied. I began walking toward the village. After a few seconds, my brother started swiftly stomping after me.

 

Soon, we arrived at the circle of small houses that made up the village and entered ours. My mom was sitting on the couch reading. “Hi mom,” I said.

 

“Hello Caden,” she responded. “Where’s Ryan? I thought he was with you.” She looked worried.

 

“Yeah. He’s right behind me.” I turned around, but my brother wasn’t there. Where did he go? I thought. How could he have disappeared without me noticing? My mother stood up and hurried out the door. “Wait!” I called. “You can’t go outside! There’s a storm!” She didn’t hear me, so I followed her out.

 

The heavy rain was so thick that I couldn’t see more than a few feet in front of me, so I waited outside of our house. After a few minutes my mother returned. She was soaked with rainwater and looked like she had just ran a mile.

 

“I told the elders,” she whispered. “They’ve gathered some men and are beginning a search.”

 

“I can help look,” I offered. She sighed. The look of disapproval on her face told me the answer before she even spoke.

 

“No. You can’t. You might get hurt,” she said.

 

“He’s my brother! It’s my fault he got lost and I’m responsible for what happens to him!” I ran off into the rain before she could say anything else.

 

“Caden! Come back here this instant!” she yelled, but I ignored her. I looked through the whole village. There was no sign of him. Where could he have gone? I thought. Why would he run off like that? Suddenly I remembered what happened in the woods. No. He wouldn’t. He’s not that stupid. No one even knows what’s out there. The wall was a guardian; it kept us safe. We had no reason to leave.

 

I arrived at the clearing where we had walked. I looked around. He wasn’t here. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed something. A patch of ripped cloth, flapping back and forth in the wind. It was the same blue as the shirt my brother wore this morning. The cloth was stuck to the barbed wire that lined the top of the wall. My mind raced.

 

He went over the wall, when all of us were afraid not to. Why wasn’t he afraid? Fear is meant to protect us, just like the wall. What we don’t know or understand can be dangerous. Yet, we are still curious about the unknown while being afraid of it at the same time. They should cancel each other out, but they don’t. Some people are more curious than others, and some are more fearful. It’s just the way we are. But the way we are can get us killed. My brother overcame our fear of the unknown without even understanding that he did. He has the most courage out of all of us. He probably was afraid when he went over the wall. Courage isn’t not having any fear. It’s overcoming fear for a greater purpose. My brother was courageous because he overcame his fear for curiosity.

 

I grabbed a branch of the tree closest to the wall and pulled myself up. I climbed and climbed until I was able to scramble up onto the wall. I stepped over the barbed wire and looked up.

 

There were no trees on the other side of the wall. As far as you could see, the ground was black. I closed my eyes and jumped down. I didn’t expect a soft landing, but I got one. When I got up, I realized that the ground covered with a thick layer of ash. I saw remnants of concrete structures poking out from under the soot. They looked like they were drowning in the endless sea of blackness.

 

I knew my brother was out there. I can have courage too. I thought. I will find him. I gazed across the sea of ash, and took my first step into the rest of the world.

I Will Succeed

Rylie

Period 3 Chintha

June 8, 2015

 

I Will Succeed

 

Eye on the prize

Mind on the goal

If I screw up my heart will nearly explode

 

Depression if I fail

Fulfillment if I succeed

Overwhelming courage is all I need

 

The passion of a dancer

The drive of a runner

Inching towards the top

But the winning never stops not even as I grow older

 

I know I fret shortcoming

Aswell as all imperfections

But I continue to give my all

Sometimes without even knowing

 

I’ve got the soul of a champion

The regret of a loser

And the serenity of a dove

 

But  most important of all…

 

I’ve got my eye on the prize

Mind set on the goal

If I ever screw up my heart will nearly explode

 

Eye on the prize

Mind on the goal

If I screw up my heart will nearly explode

 

Depression if I fail

Fulfillment if I succeed

Overwhelming courage is all I need

 

The passion of a dancer

The drive of a runner

Inching towards the top

But the winning never stops not even as I grow older

 

I know I fret shortcoming

As well as all imperfections

But I continue to give my all

Sometimes without even knowing

 

I’ve got the soul of a champion

The regret of a loser

And the serenity of a dove

 

But  most important of all…

 

I’ve got my eye on the prize

Mind set on the goal

If I ever screw up my heart will nearly explode

Fear On The Job Market By Gwen

Fear On The Job Market

When I was young, I liked to look at a picture book that was all about jobs. It frightened me a bit because I wanted to learn more about how I was going to be a vet and have a mansion, and be rich. How could I do this in the real world?      My fear is not having financial security and not having the right job.  What is financial security, you ask? Financial security is having the financial state that you have enough money to survive. In my family, financial security has always been in the back of our minds. The thing is, I feel  preordained to be a doctor, lawyer, professor, or scientist because I need to achieve this. All of these jobs give a good income and provide financial security. I remember when I was eight, my mother and father were frantically talking about managing the store my father owned and my father  said: “Gwen, never be self employed! Just get an easy job, like a doctor. ”

I went back to reading my book, but it lingered in my mind. How could I acquire financial security? What jobs could I get? My idea of a good job was a job that I could read books and drink capri-sun at my desk. That was the day that my fear came out.

 

Another thing that contributed to my fear was aftermath of the recession. I lived through this after period of joblessness. Many of my friends parents were out of jobs and many other people I knew were too . I said to myself,  “ Will this be me, when I’m older?’, “Will I have to get a whole new job,and face taxes,feeding my children,and other money related issues?” I heard my parents sitting on the couch after I went to sleep and fighting about taxes and other issues. It made me nervous and upset. When I saw pictures in the news of homeless people, I was very confused and afraid at such a premature age . I would not let this happen to myself. I axed my dreams of being a reporter and a vet. I said to myself,

“I’m gonna be a scientist or doctor.’’ That was that.  I said dreams are overrated, and left it there.

 

If you are wondering, I have never gotten over my fear. I have never really said what I truly want to be. I have always been extremely careful about money, and the idea of speculating about the future makes me sad. What do I want to be? I want to be a UN ambassador.  That sounds like it might be frivolous and far fetched, but I think it would be fascinating. That’s what I truly want to be, but if I’m in the real world, I’ll pick what’s best for my bank account, not myself  . But sometimes,when I think about my fear, I say “If you are only picking a job for money, how are you going to have goals to motivate you? Your goals would be just to get more money .” I feel like if I wanted to do a job that would be money motivated, my work would be hollow, with no meaning.
I think to be successful, you have to have the right amount of being grounded and having dreams. Many successful people have reachable  dreams, that they can follow and use it to motivate yourself. Success is not always about money, it’s not always about good jobs or such. It can be about helping others, or making change in a community. I can have a well rounded,fulfilling life without always being rich or always having a full bank account. If I really want a good job, why don’t I follow my dreams? My dream job is respectful and fulfills my needs. And when I think about this, I say my fear of not having the right job is foolish. I can have the life I want without being a doctor, lawyer, or scientist.